You Can’t Be What You Can’t See

Dear Eme,

The storyteller in me feels compelled to share a story—a story of a little girl who once dreamed big.

If you know me from Ghana, you’ll remember that I spent my early years living next to the Church of Pentecost until I turned 12. If I tell you that church constantly had weddings, you might think I’m exaggerating, but trust me, they did. I remember watching all those weddings, and I knew—I wanted that one day!

Of course, let’s not get into the work that follows those weddings; that’s a conversation for another day. But those weddings planted a seed in me. They looked exciting and beautiful, and I wanted to experience that for myself. As I grew older, weddings started to lose their significance. There was even a time when I didn’t really want one at all.

When Seyi and I began talking about forever, a wedding wasn’t exactly high on the priority list. Then one day, after a moment of prayer alone in my house, I sat down on my sofa, and a sense of “you have to have a blessing” washed over me. I couldn’t shake it. So I picked up the phone, called my friend Patricia, and told her: “We are having a wedding.”

Your poor Baba Eme! We had always said a wedding or blessing wasn’t necessary. So where did this sudden change come from? I couldn’t fully explain it, but I knew deep down that we were meant to have this blessing.

As the dust settled, things began to make sense. It was my turn to plant a seed, just like those weddings I watched as a little girl. The wedding didn’t need to be big, but it had to be exciting and beautiful. Santorini was the obvious choice—it would keep the numbers small and intimate —and the cliffside location would bring the beauty home. The excitement? Well, anyone willing to get on a plane to follow you abroad is definitely excited!

But something was missing. I needed little people to plant the seeds in.

I remember being at Bethel’s house one day, after asking her to be part of the wedding. She asked me, “What hairstyle are you thinking of having?”

I replied, “I’m thinking of an updo. What do you think?”

Bethel thoughtfully suggested, “Then have one of those things you can tie on your head.”

So we spent that day together, finding just the right one.

Then came April 13, 2019, and Bethel showed up, ready to be my little bride and maid of honor.

When I saw this picture (picture one) of Bethel, just look at her—the little girl with that smile to die for. That’s when I knew, without a doubt: “Mission accomplished.”

To all the young women who have a dream, keep that dream alive. And to all the young people for whom I get to live this dream before you arrive, happy anniversary to us all.

My prayer is that when the time comes for you to sow your own seeds, God will move whatever He needs to move to get you there.